My Sister & Me

This is our life.  These are our encounters, be they strange, awkward, humorous and sometimes painful.  We’ll begin by introducing ourselves.   We are sisters, at times best friends, and sometimes worst enemies.  Born 16 months apart we were often mistaken for twins as children, however we could not look more different today.  We’ve shared almost everything since birth including our living space.  We know everything about each other and it seems at times we know too much.  There are moments when we finish each other’s sentences or think the same absurd thought; this phenomenon is likely caused by the enormous amount of time we spend together.  We are my sister and me.

Panda	Stumpy
Younger Taller Thinner Blonder Prettier Poorer Less loud Less mean Smarter Shyer Bitchy Wise ass Cynical Sometimes Bitter Opinionated Sarcastic Slightly Sociopathic Drunker	Older Shorter Fatter Darker Harrier Richer Louder Weirder Spunkier Stubborn Meaner Wiser Bitchy Wise ass Cynical Sometimes Bitter Opinionated Sarcastic

For our first blog we’ve decided on a single story that we think best describes our sisterly dynamic.  This story takes place in Delphi, Greece.   After my sister completed her first year of college my sister, Big Sister, and I took a tour through Europe.   Our last stop was Greece, which looked surprisingly similar to the mountainous regions of southern California (where we originate from).  There were a lot of twisty mountainous roads which we toured on a giant commuter bus with a terrible Greek driver.  Having a history of severe motion sickness, I came prepared with motion sick prevention patches.  These things worked GREAT!  I literally wore the patch the entire way through Greece.  On a particularly twisty drive, I decided the patch was not working well enough and so I popped a couple Dramamine to prevent the “expulsion of stomach contents” I felt was imminent.  Upon arriving in Delphi the patch plus the extra Dramamine kicked in with a vengeance.  I appeared to my sister as though I had consumed an entire bottle of codeine.  Wandering aimlessly towards the ancient Greek ruins to begin our tour, my sister decided I was not going to make it through the tour.  My sister asked me if I wanted to return to the bus to sit and rest, to which I responded with an incoherent mumble.  My sister, taking this as an affirmative response, grasped my arm and began leading me back toward the bus.  The ruinous Greek landscape was somewhat hazardous so my sister was attempting to carefully guide me around dirty stony obstacles that were all around us.

Then it happened…

All of a sudden my sister ate shit, sliding down a small hill, running over the dirty stony obstacles.  I stared down in confused horror, not totally comprehending what the fuck was happening.  I lamely attempted to aid my sister to her feet at which time we both noticed how filthy and disgusting my sister was.  For those that have never been to Greece, do not fall in the dirt, it sticks like fucking glue.  She literally looked to be covered in dirty glue.  After analyzing the damage, my sister started making her way hastily towards a nearby restroom.  I slowly followed, still somewhat confused about what had just happened.  Reaching the bathroom, my sister began washing her hands when a very nice Greek cleaning lady handed her some paper towels.  My sister took them gratefully and began wiping the glue like dirt from her body and clothes.  The very nice Greek cleaning lady looked on in horror and began motioning to the floor trying to inform my sister that the paper towels were not for her, but to clean up the glue like dirt that she’d tracked in all over the floor.  My sister gave the very nice Greek cleaning lady a deathly look of pure hatred, at which point the cleaning lady turned and stormed out of the restroom while my sister continued her attempts to wash away the glue like dirt, getting as much on the floor as possible.

Now you know a little bit about my sister and me.  This blog will allow us to share with the world our strange, awkward, humorous, and sometimes painful stories of our lives.  Until next time…